THE PHANTOM MENACE Made Mini Vader Jake Lloyd’s Life A “Living Hell”

Star Wars actor Jake Lloyd reveals a new look
Posted on: March 7th, 2012

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I think nearly everyone alive agrees that Star Wars: The Phantom Menace was the worst thing to happen to the franchise. One of the main reasons for this (actually there’s about 40 good reasons for this, with Jar Jar appearing several times on that list because if really needs to be noted just how truly awful he is) was the fact that great actors such as Liam Neeson, Ewan Mcgregor, Natalie Portman, Samuel L. Jackson and Yoda gave us the worst performances of their careers. I don’t know if this was George Lucas’ direction to have them all be bland, boring and in Portman’s case, pretend she was a robot or if the actors just couldn’t delver the lines without wanting to vomit on themselves and their childhood memories.

On the count of 3, everyone say “Midi-chlorians”

Wait, what was this post about again, I got lost there! Oh right. Now everyone has given Jake Lloyd’s performance a hard time too (let’s face it, having Vader appear as a floppy haired moppet can only take away the menace of the galaxy’s biggest Bad-Ass) but I try to let him off abit because he was only a child, though stellar performances from Dakota Fanning and Abigail Breslin when they were off a similar age does make me wonder on letting him off so easy sometimes.

Anyway, he didn’t personally ruin the Star Wars franchise, he just helped. Now that TPM is back in the cinema (with the addition of pointless 3d no less) it appears that, the kid who retired from acting at the tender age of 12, Lloyd has been cast back into the spotlight and has revealed a few things that kind of make me feel bad for some of the things I’ve said over the years.

He said the experience working with Lucas was a “Living Hell”.

That his retirement was partly down to the fact that the filming and subsequent press tours has left him with a fear of cameras (he returned to the series in voice acting roles only)

“I’ve learned to hate it when the cameras are pointed at me.” 

And that his appearance in the film was a constant source of ridicule to children (Who as we all know, can be so very, very mean)

Other children were really mean to me. They would make the sound of the lightsaber every time they saw me. It was totally mad. My entire school life was really a living hell—and I had to do up to 60 interviews a day… When you have something like that there’s a lot of expectations for it to meet the standards of the public, and I don’t think George [Lucas] did that.

Having his childhood ruined by trying to mix being a kid, going to school and be fired around the globe to do interviews have left him resentful of George Lucas to the point were he has since destroyed all his Star Wars merchandise (Aiyee, were they still in their original packaging? You could have made a fortune on E-Bay Jake!)

You see that McDonalds over there? That’s where you’ll be working in about 15 years trying to forget this ever happened!

I’m torn between my usual sarcastic nature and kinda thinking he deserved it for ruining my childhood memories and also having a strange and unknown feeling (which I’ve researched and have found out is called “Empathy”) towards a kid who got what every one of us would have died to do. Be in a Star Wars film….and then got fucked over because of it.

Still, it just fuels to my hatred of George Lucas, so I guess that’s a win.



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Author Info

Dan is just a guy who worked in a video store and took the compliment/insult that he was like “Randal” from “Clerks” a little too literally. Thankfully Bad Haven has given him the chance to blurt out his internal monologues on nerd culture. Proclaiming his love for the things he likes (which include books, movies, games, comics) and utterly destroying the things he doesn’t (pretty much everything else). Dan is an editor, reviewer and feature writer for Bad Haven.

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  • http://erytr jodie

    Your Comments

    I would love to rub the backs of Jake Lloyd’s sexy thighs and squeeze his juicy bumcheeks as I fondle and play with his hot little cock and sexy smooth balls!!!

    • Bad Man

      Jake, if your reading this Jodie would like to: rub the backs of your sexy thighs and squeeze your juicy bumcheeks as she/he? fondles and plays with your hot little cock and sexy smooth balls!!! I mean shit Jodie, I wish I was Jake Lloyd. That’s assuming of course your not a massive dude with a hairy back who’s real name is Vinny? Your not, are you Jodie? ……Are you? :O

  • http://try jodie

    Your Comments

    Jake has got the sexiest, smoothest thighs and legs!!!!!!… some nice pics of him wearing soccer shorts and swimming trunks too…..WOW!!!!!!…..Jake should have worn shorts in the Phantom menace……just showing off his gorgeous legs would have been totally awesome for me!!!!

  • http://fgfhgh jodie

    Your Comments

    I want ed to fuck Jake Lloyd so much when he was 10 and I was 14….he had the most gorgeous kissable lips and a really nice bum!!!!….I totally wanted to fondle and suck his smooth balls and juicy boy cock all night!!!….I would have wanked him off all the time he wanted it too!!!