THE SKINNY: Casting Round-Up With Added HATE!

Posted on: February 17th, 2012

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ZORRO Re-imagined…Or Something?

Gael Garcia Bernal will play a new version of Zorro as a masked vigilante bent on revenge in what will be a futuristic reboot of the classic mythology not be set in California or Mexico, despite the story’s Western themes. So basically not Zorro then? In fact I’d go as far as to say this sounds like something else entirely. The last Zorro outing was when Puss In Boots did it in 2005 or something. I can’t remember as it was pretty mediocre (and I was very drunk at the time).

What doo h'yoo mean meeediocre! H'where did you leave h'your taste BAD MAN?


Beauty And The Cheese

Kristin Kreuk is in a new TV version of Beauty And The Beast that guarantees I’ll never be able to take is seriously:

I'm like, such a tough minded bad ass! Isn't that right Mister Puggum's? Hey, I'm not a muchkin, shut up!

“It centers on Catherine (Kreuk), a tough-minded NYPD Homicide Detective haunted by witnessing her mother’s murder 9 years ago and the killers’ quick demise at the hands of a Beast. After years of searching, Catherine finally finds the Beast, Vincent Koslow, the survivor of a military experiment that went disastrously wrong, and becomes the protector of his secret life as a bestial superhero.” 

Grrr...shit yourself, didn't ya!

Kreuk as a tough cop. Brilliant bit of casting. Now fetch me Adam Brody as The Beast and we’re all set.


Original Cast Won’t Return For Transformers 4. Megan Fox Spotted Laughing Heinously 

Bwa ha ha! No one knows what it's be the bad be the sad man....behind closed sets

Josh Duhamel, the brah dude who played Lt. Colonel William Lennox in Transformers recently revealed:

“I don’t think anybody’s doing it,”

 “I know Shia [LaBoeuf]‘s not doing it. I don’t think Tyrese or Rosie [Huntington-Whiteley] or anybody else is doing it.” He also went on to say that he is not surprised that Paramount is moving forward with more Transformers films since the last on grossed over 1 billion dollars at the box office last summer. “Whenever these movies make that much money they’re going to make as many as they can, but I haven’t heard anything about it. They haven’t called me.”

Well I must say I’m very upset. When you said the original cast wouldn’t return Josh, I thought you meant all those crap versions of my favorite Transformers as well. Cruelly deceptive that was. Rumors In Disguise!


Speedy Gets Cast In Green Arrow And He’s A She

Deadline is reporting that Willa Holland will be playing the part of Oliver Queen’s younger sister, Thea Queen with the below description:

Thea Queen, Oliver’s younger sister. She was 12 when Oliver and her father disappeared. Now she’s a “celebutante” who acts badly. She loved her big brother with all of her heart, and she’s glad to have him back – but now that she’s older and spreading her wings, she might not be ready for Oliver to be Bad Cop in her family and making sure she behaves. She is the only one who gets away with calling Oliver “Ollie,” and Ollie, in turn, calls her “Speedy.” 

As anyone who read the comic knows, Speedy was originally Roy ‘Speedy’ Harper, GA’s teen side kick and a class ‘A’ drug head, who would clean up to become Arsenal in the Teen Titans and eventually Red Arrow in the pre-reboot JLA.

Thea’s nickname is likely just an homage to the original character, unless they plan on getting her in on the action some way down the line (her druggie socialite tendencies may cause her to need avenging vigilante redemption/intervention?).



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